Today is September 18th. It would've been Jason's 41st birthday. This weekend would also be our 3 year anniversary. But something happened yesterday to take a little of all that pain away.
I received a call from our rep at the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. After a discussion earlier in the day, they've decided to create a new award - one that will go to someone who has gone above and beyond the call of duty in fundraising for the society. They decided to name the award after someone who had lost his/her life to one of the many diseases they fight. And, incredibly, they picked Jason. The award will be named The Jason Harmon Enduring Spirit Award.
When Jennfier told me, I was frozen in shock. I immediately started crying and didn't stop for 2 hours. I was just so completely floored that they would choose to honor Jason's fight & my fight to keep his memory alive. And the fact that today's his birthday just made the announcement all the more sweet. And to top it all off, Jason's parents will be at the walk this year.
I can't think of a more perfect way to celebrate Jason, his life, and his birthday.
Until next time --
Stuart
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Different Year, Same Feelings
This time last year, I was dreading September. This month brought with it Jason's 40th birthday, our anniversary, and the first-ever Remembrance Ceremony for the North Texas Leukemia & Lymphoma Society that I was asked to speak at. There were a lot of reminders of Jason, and a lot of reminders that he was gone.
A year later, little has changed for the month of September. His 41st birthday is this Saturday, and the following week would've been our third anniversary. It's also the 2nd annual Remembrance Ceremony, though this year I won't be speaking. So much has changed, yet so much - more than I thought - hasn't.
This was a big week for me. My big Stand Up To Cancer special debuted on Saturday to rave reviews. I've received incredible feedback from everyone involved. The best reaction so far has been from my boss, though. On Friday, I called her into the edit bay to watch a rough cut of the entire special. She hadn't seen any of the stories yet, and I wanted her eyes on it before we put the finishing touches on everything. By the end of it, both of us were in tears. I was crying because I was so incredibly proud of how it all came together. She was in tears because she was moved by so many of the stories we had put together. It was a great moment for me in my life & my career. And at that moment, I also cried because the one person I wanted to share it with wasn't there.
That hurt like hell. I haven't hurt in a long time from all of this, but damn it that hurt. I wanted to pick up the phone and call him and tell him how great it had turned out. I wanted to sit, wrapped in his arms, while watcing my masterpiece on TV yesterday. That is the only thing that could've made this whole experience any better.
And now, I'm looking ahead to Saturday which would've been Jason's 41st birthday. We don't have much planned - not like we did last year. But, I'm sure a few of us will get together and toast him. It's hard to for me to believe that it's only been three years since Jason and I first met face to face. It was the weekend of his birthday, and it was love at first sight.
So, once again... a year later... I'm wishing September would disappear. This month only brings with it sadness, and memories of a life that's been changed forever.
By the way - if you'd like to watch my special, just click the name: CBS11 Special Report: North Texans Stand Up To Cancer.
Until next time --
Stuart
A year later, little has changed for the month of September. His 41st birthday is this Saturday, and the following week would've been our third anniversary. It's also the 2nd annual Remembrance Ceremony, though this year I won't be speaking. So much has changed, yet so much - more than I thought - hasn't.
This was a big week for me. My big Stand Up To Cancer special debuted on Saturday to rave reviews. I've received incredible feedback from everyone involved. The best reaction so far has been from my boss, though. On Friday, I called her into the edit bay to watch a rough cut of the entire special. She hadn't seen any of the stories yet, and I wanted her eyes on it before we put the finishing touches on everything. By the end of it, both of us were in tears. I was crying because I was so incredibly proud of how it all came together. She was in tears because she was moved by so many of the stories we had put together. It was a great moment for me in my life & my career. And at that moment, I also cried because the one person I wanted to share it with wasn't there.
That hurt like hell. I haven't hurt in a long time from all of this, but damn it that hurt. I wanted to pick up the phone and call him and tell him how great it had turned out. I wanted to sit, wrapped in his arms, while watcing my masterpiece on TV yesterday. That is the only thing that could've made this whole experience any better.
And now, I'm looking ahead to Saturday which would've been Jason's 41st birthday. We don't have much planned - not like we did last year. But, I'm sure a few of us will get together and toast him. It's hard to for me to believe that it's only been three years since Jason and I first met face to face. It was the weekend of his birthday, and it was love at first sight.
So, once again... a year later... I'm wishing September would disappear. This month only brings with it sadness, and memories of a life that's been changed forever.
By the way - if you'd like to watch my special, just click the name: CBS11 Special Report: North Texans Stand Up To Cancer.
Until next time --
Stuart
Saturday, September 4, 2010
It's Been A While...
Wow! It's been a long time since I got on here and wrote something. Over a month. Time flies, I guess. Things have been quite crazy around here - mainly with work. I took on a huge project recently that's quite literally taken up my entire life. It's something I'm extremely passionate about...can you guess? That's right, it's about cancer.
A couple months ago, I pitched a proposal to my management about putting together a 30-minute special about the fight against cancer in North Texas. We're tying it all into the national Stand Up To Cancer which will be airing across many different networks on Friday, September 10th. Our local special will be airing on Saturday, September 11th.
Within this special, we're profiling local patients who have or currently are standing up to fight cancer. We're profiling doctors who have made it their life's work to beat cancer. We're taking a tour of a brand new, state-of-the-art cancer center that will be opening soon in Dallas. And, we're remembering Leah Siegel - a breast cancer patient I blogged about who passed away recently. It's 30-minutes full of information, compelling & emotional battles, inspiration, and hope.
I was talking to a friend of mine tonight about purpose. He's having trouble figuring out what his purpose in life is supposed to be. I have to wonder if I've found mine...courtesy of what happened to me and to Jason. I have such a passion, desire, and frankly a need to talk about cancer - the disease, those fighting it, and those trying to stop it. The more we talk the closer we get to figuring out a better way to beat it. It just makes me wonder if all of this happened so that one more voice - a voice with the opportunity to take to the airwaves - would be added to the chorus of millions of other voices already screaming.
I have put my heart and soul into this special. It's become a mission...my mission. After this week, it'll be over. But I don't want it to be. I want to continue doing this work. The last few weeks have been so incredible. I've met so many amazing people - patients and doctors - whose stories are just unbelievable. One woman, Gail, was diagnosed with breast cancer in her 30s. She beat it, and then over the next 15 years was diagnosed with lung cancer three different times. This past spring, she was diagnosed with breast cancer again! That's FIVE different cancer diagnoses over the last 30 years. Yet through all of that she has kept her amazingling positive attitude and most of all...her loving husband has stood by her side through it all. Their love truly has withstood the test of time.
I met a 16-year old girl who cried during her interview saying she wasn't ready to die. She was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia last year and just became the first in North Texas to have a specialized treatment. She's now looking forward to a future of finishing school and becoming an oncology nurse at the same hospital where her life was saved.
I interviewed a husband who just three weeks prior lost his wife to breast cancer. I, unfortunately, have the unique perspective of knowing what he's going through...so needless to say, we both cried our way through that interview. But more importantly, her life & legacy is already working wonders...reaching thousands of people around the world. It's incredible to me how much impact one life can have.
This may be my job, but this is someone else working through me. This is Jason's impact on my life. I wouldn't be doing any of this - telling any of these incredible stories - if it weren't for him and his stamp on my heart. As cheesey as that sounds...it's the honest to G-d truth. His battle with cancer, his bravery, his "no giving up" attitude inspired me beyond belief. He changed my life forever...and my work now is finally reflecting that. And, it's making me miss him even more. I so wish he was here with me as I worked my way through this special. I would've loved to come home, collapse in his arms, and tell him about all these awesome people I've met. I think he would've liked hearing their stories.
Until next time --
Stuart
A couple months ago, I pitched a proposal to my management about putting together a 30-minute special about the fight against cancer in North Texas. We're tying it all into the national Stand Up To Cancer which will be airing across many different networks on Friday, September 10th. Our local special will be airing on Saturday, September 11th.
Within this special, we're profiling local patients who have or currently are standing up to fight cancer. We're profiling doctors who have made it their life's work to beat cancer. We're taking a tour of a brand new, state-of-the-art cancer center that will be opening soon in Dallas. And, we're remembering Leah Siegel - a breast cancer patient I blogged about who passed away recently. It's 30-minutes full of information, compelling & emotional battles, inspiration, and hope.
I was talking to a friend of mine tonight about purpose. He's having trouble figuring out what his purpose in life is supposed to be. I have to wonder if I've found mine...courtesy of what happened to me and to Jason. I have such a passion, desire, and frankly a need to talk about cancer - the disease, those fighting it, and those trying to stop it. The more we talk the closer we get to figuring out a better way to beat it. It just makes me wonder if all of this happened so that one more voice - a voice with the opportunity to take to the airwaves - would be added to the chorus of millions of other voices already screaming.
I have put my heart and soul into this special. It's become a mission...my mission. After this week, it'll be over. But I don't want it to be. I want to continue doing this work. The last few weeks have been so incredible. I've met so many amazing people - patients and doctors - whose stories are just unbelievable. One woman, Gail, was diagnosed with breast cancer in her 30s. She beat it, and then over the next 15 years was diagnosed with lung cancer three different times. This past spring, she was diagnosed with breast cancer again! That's FIVE different cancer diagnoses over the last 30 years. Yet through all of that she has kept her amazingling positive attitude and most of all...her loving husband has stood by her side through it all. Their love truly has withstood the test of time.
I met a 16-year old girl who cried during her interview saying she wasn't ready to die. She was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia last year and just became the first in North Texas to have a specialized treatment. She's now looking forward to a future of finishing school and becoming an oncology nurse at the same hospital where her life was saved.
I interviewed a husband who just three weeks prior lost his wife to breast cancer. I, unfortunately, have the unique perspective of knowing what he's going through...so needless to say, we both cried our way through that interview. But more importantly, her life & legacy is already working wonders...reaching thousands of people around the world. It's incredible to me how much impact one life can have.
This may be my job, but this is someone else working through me. This is Jason's impact on my life. I wouldn't be doing any of this - telling any of these incredible stories - if it weren't for him and his stamp on my heart. As cheesey as that sounds...it's the honest to G-d truth. His battle with cancer, his bravery, his "no giving up" attitude inspired me beyond belief. He changed my life forever...and my work now is finally reflecting that. And, it's making me miss him even more. I so wish he was here with me as I worked my way through this special. I would've loved to come home, collapse in his arms, and tell him about all these awesome people I've met. I think he would've liked hearing their stories.
Until next time --
Stuart
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