A Career Crossroads

They say everyone will find themselves at a crossroads at least once in your life.  I've been at a crossroads several times.  I think, so far, that I've chosen the correct path each time, and it's led me to yet another fork in the road.  Yet, this time, I'm having a lot of trouble deciding which fork to take.

I'm a firm believer that everything in life happens for a reason.  I believe people are brought in and out of your life for a reason.  You're supposed to learn something from everyone in your life whether you know it or not.  Jason was brought into my life for a reason.  I know that.  I believe he entered my life to open my eyes, help me change my priorities, and help me realize that things in my life needed to change.  And boy, have they.

3 years ago when I moved to Dallas, I was all about my career.  I knew what I wanted, and I had worked so hard to get where I was.  Enter Jason.  He made me think about my life, about my career and what I wanted.  Then the shit hit the fan.  He got cancer, and everything changed.  He became my world.  His disease became my world.  Eventually, his death became my world.

Something positive came out of all of it, though.  I am now dedicating myself to his memory and raising awareness of the disease through the Light The Night Walk and working with the LLS.  We raised a lot of money last year, and this year, we're going to double it.  But, it's becoming so much more than that.  I want to continue working with the LLS and help them do more to raise awareness.  For months now, I've been trying to get out of my current job and get into the public relations industry.  I've said that my dream job would be doing media relations and PR for the LLS, of course because the cause is closest to my heart.

That's when I came to the crossroads.  One prong of the road would keep me on the path I've been on.  I'd continue working in my current job - which of late has been a source of unbelievable misery in my life.  I'm completely unhappy in my job, and there is no light at the end of the tunnel.  My priorities have change.  It's not what I want to do with my life.  At all.  I want out.  I've wanted out.  I just need a reason.

Prong number two recently arose.  I had a call with the nat'l marketing director for the LLS.  We discussed several options that could help bring me on board.  Right now, all they could offer me is a contracted "consulting" position.  I'm supposed to come up with a proposal, my rates, and responsibilities.  Assuming they like it, I could start with them pretty quickly, but only part time...10-15 hours a week.  It's not enough to sustain myself as a full time job, but it's too much for me to do while maintaining a full time job.  So I can travel down path A and not change a thing, or I can travel down path B and quit my "stable" job with a stable check and benefits, and go into a contract consulting position that's not guaranteed, with fewer hours and less pay with the LLS.  Now you see my problem.

Whichever road I choose to take, I need to be 100% committed to it.  I need to decide how much of a risk I'm willing to take to seek out my dream job.  Is it the right time?  Should I wait?  What about my happiness...how much should that weigh in on my decision?  It's quite the crossroads I've come to, isn't it?  Anyone have any suggestions/advice?  I'm open to anything.

Until next time --
Stuart