May 28, 2010

It's Friday, May 28, 2010.  It's been one year since I watched the love of my life slip away from me.  I've been dreading this day for weeks now, but I'm starting to learn the anticipation of the event is actually worse than the event itself.  Today has actually been a pretty great day.  I think it's a day that Jason would've loved since...well... it was all about him.  LOL  I'm kidding.  But seriously, it was a good day.

After breakfast, Jerrod and I went to the cemetery for some private time.  It was there that I had my "big breakdown" for the day.  Walking up to his gravestone, a wave of sadness came over me.  As I drew nearer, the tears just started to fall.  I walked to the back of the stone where Jason's name is engraved, I sat down in the grass, and I just cried.  I touched his name...retracing it with my fingers...Jason Andrew Harmon...and then I put my hand on the date...May 28, 2009.  A date that forever changed my life.

I sat there for a few minutes and continued to touch his name, cry, and tell him how much I miss & still love him. Jerrod was so sweet to walk around and give me a few minutes to myself.  I stood up as he walked back over, and we hugged in front of the stone.  I expressed how incredible it was to me that the pain was just as great one year later as it was the day it happened.  It blows my mind that in a year it's never lessened...not that I really expected it to.  We stood there and cried together for a minute before I headed back to the car to give him some time alone.

A few minutes later, we were on our way to Jason's parent's house where we remained for the majority of the day.  We sat outside on their beautiful deck enjoying this amazing weather.  We sat and talked about Jason, remembering the final days...but not the sad stuff.  We remembered the funny things, the jokes, the comments...the things that made us laugh.  There were a few tears here and there, but it really felt good to laugh.  Later in the afternoon, the four of us headed back to the cemetery to mark the event together.  A few more tears, but there was more laughter, too.

Jason's friends John-Michael and his wife Heather drove down from New Hampshire to meet us for dinner.  John-Michael had been there with us on Jason's final day last year, so we were so happy to get to spend the evening with them on this special day.  Dinner was fantastic, and so was the company.  More stories, more laughter... it really made for the perfect ending to a great day of memories.

On top of all of that, (as of this writing) our "Donate On 28" campaign for Team Jason helped land us another $3,900!  Combined with our total, that gives Team Jason $11,900 so far this year.  That's already $1,000 more than what we raised last year following his death.  Absolutely INCREDIBLE!

Jason would've been proud.