First Round Is Over

Well, the first round of movers has come and gone.  Everything in the pile you saw in the video that's for Jason's parents is now loaded up on a truck and being hauled to Boston.  Everything in the bedroom we shared is now gone.

It was a lot harder than I thought it would be.  I didn't expect that today would be so hard.  I really expected that tomorrow would be the worst part...because then the house will be entirely empty.  I was cautious about today, but I really didn't think I'd have the reaction I did.

I was doing ok through most of the packing and moving.  It wasn't until they started moving the bedroom stuff out of the house that I nearly lost it.  I had to literally bite my cheek over and over and over again to keep myself from breaking down right there in front of the movers.  They didn't know who I am...and they certainly didn't know the backstory of this place.  I didn't want to make myself uncomfortable or them, either.  So I held it in.

After everything was done and all the paperwork was signed, I said goodbye to the movers and shut the door.  Within seconds of the door closing, I was on the floor gasping for air as I was crying uncontrollably.  It all just came flooding out at once.  It was like the tears and emotions were in a mad dash to get out of my body.  I couldn't control it, and frankly, I didn't want to.  I let it out for about 5 minutes straight, and then I picked myself up, dried my face, blew my nose, and that was it.  Breakdown over.

So now I'm thinking to myself...if today was that hard, what is tomorrow going to be like?  Will it be easier because all the extremely personal stuff is gone?  Or, will it still be hard because the place will truly be empty after it's done?  I guess we'll find out tomorrow, won't we?

Even though I was here by myself today, I had a lot of support, and I could definitely feel it.  People were leaving me messages on facebook and twitter.  I can't thank everyone enough for all the love and support.  This chapter is almost closed.  Just a little bit more to go.

Until next time --
Stuart